The current difficult economic times has many parents
struggling over Christmas gifts and how it will affect their
children this year. There are many families that are going
to be forced this season to choose between food, mortgage
payments, prescriptions, gasoline, and heating their homes.
Although everyone is affected, the elderly, the parents that
have been recently laid-off, and the poorer families, are
being hit particularly hard. Unfortunately, the financial
predictions for the next couple of months are rather bleak
and conditions are not expected to improve dramatically by
Christmas.
While I certainly do not mean to minimize the pain and
difficulties that this Christmas season may bring, I am
suggesting that it can present opportunities to recapture
some of the traditional American family and Christmas
values. As readers of my articles well know, I am a strong
believer that the best gift a parent can ever give their
child - is simply themselves. "Doing with" will always be
more meaningful to a child than simply "buying for." As I
have mentioned before, our fondest childhood memories are
usually those that centered on family involvement - often
when we were the poorest financially. Think about it for a
moment. Think about your fondest memories when you were a
young child. What were they? Chances are they were something
you did with your family. The money or the gifts that may
have been involved are not what you typically remember the
most. Shortly after my recent book, "The Adventures of
Seamus the Sheltie" was published, I began to receive
requests from parents for certain difficult subject areas
for children to be dealt with by Seamus in the next book.
Interestingly, this exact area was one that was frequently
requested by many of the parents. What follows are some
suggestions on how to deal with these issues.
1) Make some of your own Christmas decorations. Make this a
family project and be sure to involve the children. This can
be inexpensive and really fun to do together. There are many
crafts books that are chocked full of ideas that can be
checked out for free from your local library. It is amazing
all of the neat things that you can make with paper, tape,
and string. These things should always be done with - not
for - the child.
2) Remember stringing popcorn when you were a child? This is
still a fun and inexpensive activity that can produce
beautiful garland to string around the windows and doors.
Again - be sure the child helps and is involved.
3) An inexpensive children's book makes a wonderful gift
that can last over time. I am talking about a book that you
read together with your child. One that has content designed
so that you can easily discuss the stories with the child.
Remember that children's books can also be checked out free
from your local library.
4) Don't forget that if your situation does not allow for
buying a book or easily visiting a library, make up your own
stories! My grandfather did this with me when I was a child
and those times and stories are still among my fondest
memories.
5) Drive - or walk - around with the family and look at the
Christmas lights in your area. Riding together in the car is
also a great time to sing a few holiday carols.
6) Start a new family tradition: Everyone (that includes Mom
and Dad) will make one Christmas gift for each family
member. It doesn't have to be fancy or expensive. It will be
the thought - and the process - and the love - that will
count.
Chances are you still have the small things that your child
has made for you tucked away somewhere for safe keeping.
Those precious things are the thoughts, memories, and the
love that I am talking about. Remember that your child will
be looking to you to understand what is happening and how
they should feel. So get that frown off your face and stop
apologizing like something is wrong. Smile and share your
love for each other and celebrate the season with your
children. Do this - and they will smile and celebrate with
you. We can't change these difficult times and what may be a
lean Christmas, but we can greatly influence how our
children will experience them.
Author, Masters Level Child Psychologist, muscian, Sheltie
lover
